We need some input here.

It's Anna by the way, I'm still borrowing Pauls acct until we make a decision as to what were going to do.

Well for starters, were all fine, no Slenderman, no Proxy attacks, not reprisals... it's been, kinda peacefull, I even took Maya out to see fireworks with Mike and Angel last night....

Maya.... She's not talking at all, she barely seems to be recognizing anyone here, and she's pretty much out of touch with reality right now.

Angel and I are taking care of her hygiene and food needs, she eats when given foot, but needs help with baths and... you know I'm not going into this in detail right now.

Since Paul is gone, the three of us are discussing what we should do with the blog, when Mike's not burying his ass in front of the computer killing all the bandwidth playing "The Secret World". Truth be told, we don't know where to go from here.

Do we keep the blog going in Paul's name? I mean I'd set up my own blogger acct and post from there
Do we start up a new blog?


What do you all think we should do at this point?

Super afterthought to the point of editing the post to add this, look the guy helped us out allot, can you guys give Vergil here some love?

Paul is gone...

This is Anna, I'm going to try to explain, as best I can, the final fight of Paul Rayfield... I realize now this is why I was involved with Paul, with his story, with his life.

Why after his friends were thought lost, why I met him, and Mike, and Angel, and the Oracle....

I was meant to close out his story, to put write his last chapter....

We didn't leave a note last night before we left to face Antonio, Mike and Angel stayed behind, I went with Paul, Vergil, and Vergil's team, Vergil advised we needed the element of surprise, and given Paul's habit of giving those little "Just in case I die" Messages before it hits the fan.....

Anyways I'm wasting word count, Antonio was held up in an abandoned restaurant, Paul seemed to recognize the place, and gave a sort of rough layout for Vergil's team...

They went in both the front and the back, I didn't see what happened to Vergil's team, just after allot of shooting, and screaming, all the guns went Silent, it was at this point I snuck in, just out of sight....

I saw Paul and Vergil facing off against Antonio, the Black Bokken, was more of, what's the word, a Cestus with a long blade sticking out of it. Paul asked Antonio to stand down

"Sorry, You want Maya alive, you BOTH DIE" Antonio bellowed
"Aw, and here I thought we were old friends Hoody?" Vergil snickered out
"Save it Vergil! You said my only options was for me to die, or lose Maya for good? Sorry friend, I'm opting for a third option, I beat you and save the girl, how does that sound" Paul spoke out in a confident, but unwell tone,

Antonio gave a classic slasher smile "Like Classic you, hopelessly naive."

I can't believe how fast Antonio Moved, Vergil opened up with that rapid fire shotgun of his, and only hit the walls before Antonio actually kicked him out of the building, leaving Paul, with that weird "Fade Katana" trick he had been working on the last few days.

You know, I know the stronger of a blade he could create, the closer he was to his end, and he looked like he was one foot in the grave all day yesterday, big bags under his eyes, pale, he actually looked like his weight was dropping off as he starting to fade away slowly. he looked more like a walking corpse than the strong man we knew him to be.

Anyways Paul's moves were, fluid, almost ethereal, like a man in the peak of health, rather than facing his last hours on earth, Paul was stabbed once in the stomach, and he was bleeding. But Paul struck he last blow, a powerful, deep strike down Antonio's chest. The blade seemed to cut through Antonio's telekinetic defenses.

"I'm real sorry my friend" Paul was crying as he swung down, taking Antonio's head to end his suffering... he let out a cry of anguish afterwards.

Vergil made it back in the building, he looked pretty shocked as well, I mean Vergil called Antonio is "Rival"... I must of figured that maybe he thought that he would of struck the last blow...

Paul picked up the Bokken.... and the creepiness returned with the color in his face. He didn't smile, he didn't look satisfied with himself...

Paul never told us how he was going to get his love back, but he said he had an idea.

Paul shouted "HEY SLENDY, GET THE FUCK OUT HERE, I GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU, YOU BASTARD!!!"

To say he looked pissed, well that was putting it mildly, I don't know how I looked hugging a wall, but Vergil, well his calm composure was gone at that point. "Paul what the hell are you doing?"

Paul ignored him and went around smacking stuff with the Bokken shouting the Slenderman's name, trying to get it's attention.

It would of been okay, let him rant a bit, call out the horrid monster that was stalking us all, and hoped nothing happen, that would of been fine

But we all got a chill, we all looked in the same direction, and there was the god damn monster itself...

None of us spoke, we all felt like we made a terrible mistake at that point, well at least I did, Paul shook off the fear, looking less sick as the Bokken held his soul in place, he stammered for a second, before closing his eyes, finding his center, smirked and spoke

"So you made a deal with my friend over there right? So I'm going to make you a deal right now, this thing" We waived the Bokken tentatively "Well this can hurt you, or pass for hurting you right?, and you would rather see it out of Runner hands I'm sure, so were going to make a trade."

I looked at him, I felt my heart sink, I felt the urge to scream, but I couldn't muster the will to do so... I wanted to tell him to stop, to not do this, we just fought so hard for the Bokken so we could keep him on this earth, he was going to throw it away now!

"Give me Maya, and you can have this!"

Vergil and I was shocked, our Jaws were damn near on the floor when he said that...

The slenderman, without speaking, but clear as day said "Deal"

I blinked out of reflex, and she was there, literally just like that, not coherent but looking around, she saw Paul, Vergil, me, but she didn't speak, the slenderman released her and she took a few steps towards us before dropping to the floor

Paul stepped beside her and tossed the Bokken to the Slenderman, who caught it with a Tentacle... and with another forced Blink. It was gone...

Paul; laughed... then crumpled to the floor next to her, on his knees he cradled her, I couldn't hear what was said, but even in the girls half dazed half crazed state, she smile and mouthed what I saw was "I love you"

Paul started to, I guess the words I'm looking for is "crumble into light", I guess the Bokken not being in our world anymore speed up the process of his fading, they kissed one more time, and he looked at us both and said his last words.

"I wish I had more time" with a tear filled smile....

Then he was gone... he faded completely.

So now you know the end of Paul's story, and the start of ours, I plan on keeping the blog going out of memory for him, maybe he'll find a way to comeback someday, Kinda like Obi-Wan or something. But he's gone from our world.

Maya is sleeping on the couch, she's not talking and is only in god knows what mental state she's in, it's not good.

Vergil I guess volunteered to contact a couple other runners Paul knew to break the bad news. he said he would stop by before leaving, but his mission is over, and he frankly could not stay for long past this night.

The Oracle, left once we broke the news to him, he said "Paul's going to need a guide in the fade" Before leaving, it's kinda reassuring that he's not alone out there.

Angel, Mike, Maya, and Myself carry on, and we'll keep carrying on for now, I'm not stupid enough to believe were out of the woods yet, but we got a bit of a breather for right now, we'll live a day at a time.

We'll live... We'll live.

Dead in days..

So hey, turns out i'm going to be basicly dead in a few days... I knew something was up, i'm picking up the Oracle's training way to god damn quick... I work up this morning and I actually could see through my arm... which... I won't lie, I screamed like a bitch seeing that...

Anna, Angel, and Mike, god this can't be easy on them, there off getting gun training by the Agent I mentioned last post, fucker probbly see's them as cannon fodder... But I won't be taking them with me when it's time, I won't do that to them....

You see, By the end of the week, I probbly will have faded out fully, After a sit down chat with Anna, we both decided that, well, I just can't bring myself to do something as dispicible as impregnate the girl, just to save my own ass... I mean... I ju


***********************************

Anna here

Sorry everyone, Paul's laying down right now, he just had a bad bout of vomiting, and he can't finish this post, so I'm going to finish it for him. He needs his rest right now.

He's right, this is hard on all of us, Paul and the Oracle's plan, is to push Paul to almost the verge of  "death", with the idea that he would become "strong" enough to engage Antonio in combat, with the help of sevral well armed federal agents from this so called "Organization" to take down Antonio quick and dirty... and that with that power running through him. He might be able to somehow pull Maya out from where she is...

The whole idea is stupid, and It's going to cost him his life.... He... He can't survive this... There's really no fucking way he can survive this.... I'm going to lose him!

Fuck... Is this what it means to have to run from that fucking monster! To try an live long enough to die "Well"? It's fucking bullshit is what it is! No one fucking deserves to die, or "Fade" or whatever the fuck is going to happen to him...

I mean what if he saves Maya! He still fucking dies right!

I'm sorry... I'll wrap this up... Paul says that tomorrow night is the night,  Once he's up and moving, he's going to get in a cram session with this agent, and try to hammer out a plan to beat Antonio...

It just feel's pointless....

OH Before I forget, I got told I could link to the Agent's blog... yeah the asshole was monitoring us for a while... Asshole...

A minor breakthrough

So it's been a couple days since my last post, lets get the recap out of the way before I go any further

I'm still "Fading" out, this has been joined by a vomiting some weird material I'm told is "Ectoplasm"
Anna is back to normal, Angel still hates my guys, Mike is still Gun-ho about fighting with me.

So like I said I made a minor breakthrough in training to use my fading out as a power source, we were doing this kind of, odd training, in which he set up a training dummy and had me pantomime trying to cut it  in half. He told me with each swing I need to try and imagine that I am in fact holding a weapon able to cut it.

Well hey trying to cut something with a non-existent sword wasn't working out, who knew right?

The Oracle had me stop, I guess he could tell I wasn't behind it, and then he demonstrated cutting the arm off the dummy with *his* "Imaginary" sword.

He used his willpower, and the power of his connection to the fade, to cut the dummy. 

Well it blew my mind, so I just had to learn to do that, I was to close my eyes, *Grab* the blade I could see in my mind.... He asked me describe the blade, a Silver blade coming to a precise edge, the slight curvature of the Katana, the weight of the blade and how it compared to the weight of the hilt, he wanted me to describe the hilt, made of a white wood material, with blue die wrapping around it, the pommel had the Japanese symbol for "Oni" on it. Because this blade was in my mind, meant to cut demons.

With my eyes closed I gave the weapons a few tentative strikes... he had me imagine, no... not imagine, *believe* that I was holding this sword, believe it will all my heart and soul, I was told to not "Think" this blade was going to strike down the Dummy, I was to *Know* this blade would strike down this dummy.

I swung the blade... and I heard nothing, I knew I was close enough to the dummy to hit it with a real Katana, Dejected I opened my eyes and dropped my hands to my sides, I looked at the oracle who was smiling, he gestured over to the dummy...

Well it wasn't in half on the floor but it had a shallow cut across the chest of it, and I had done that, with a sword that was only real in my head.....

Yeah Mind... Fucking... Blown....


Oh, and to the Federal Agent who offered to help us track down Antonio? I know I told you to fuck off at the time, but since I figured your watching the blog? Fine, I'll let you help us out.

The Death of Manic Muse....

As I promised you all, I'll post here.... not directly, what the Oracle told me about Manic...

In the last post from him, he was gravely injured, trapped, alone... dying.... the last thing he posted, was a message to me saying "See you around Paul"

Manic Muse's body was found abandoned in an dumpster only five miles from where he had been known to stay in London, the Oracle said that he had been... well as he put it "The state of his body left no room for doubt that he was dead"

Shit... I still can't fucking deal with this right now....

He was my friend... He helped Gargoyle in his projects.... I mean... Yeah he was crazy, but aren't we all just a little fucking crazy right now?

He did some bad things, well who in the fuck hasn't at this point? We all killed, we all fought, we saw others fight on our behalf... I can say one thing, at least he was fucking honest about himself, he knew who he was, while most of us are lying to ourselves....

He knew allot about the Slenderman, he was, in no uncertain terms, an exceptional man, who lived... no Survived a hard life, by being harder than it...

...........

I'm going to miss him, I've seen bloggers check out before now, but... out of all of them... I'm going to miss him... He was my friend...

I'm told he's going to be buried under his birth name, which none of us know.... None of us knew his name, so I'm hoping the few people who did know him will take the time to see him off to the other side...

Well Manic, you son of a bitch, when I kick the bucket and see you on the other side, you better have a god damn pint waiting for me, because I'm hoping I'm going to have a few stories to share with you by then.

Questionible Methods.

The Oracle has arrived... Okay he arrived earlier today, I had done some light sparing with Anna, who's pulled her self together, were both sparing with a sense of seriousness now that...

Well now that I'm "Dying"...

Let me paint the picture here, Anna was sitting on a couch next to Mike, Anna is wearing some cat-eared Hoody sweater,  Mike is wearing work shirt labeled "Tower lanes" where he used to work, Angel has her shoulder bandaged heavily, and is wearing a white T-shirt, her arm is in a sling.  I'm wearing my normal black tank top and blue jeans, worn and faded from travel and fighting, at today I'm wearing a bandage over my ruined eye, which I'm doing for Angel's sake. All of us are bruised or hurt in someway...

The oracle on the other hand, is wearing pagan monk robes and looks to be older than us all.

For the most part he talks to us about, well the severity of our situation, but he didn't come over to explain the obvious, he pulled me aside for a bit so we could talk.

The oracle was disappointed about me loosing my anchor, to someone who actually wants to kill me no less. "The only good thing is he has to kill you not let you fade out" he said, however he also said that "However too get you strong enough to survive a fight with that proxy, we need months not days to teach you" So we knew the problem.

"We need to find or make a new anchor for you...."

So yeah, how hard could that be, get some rock, bless the shit out of it, call it good right?

The oracle just looked at me... disappointed "The last Object that was strong enough to contain your soul here, was probably one of the most powerful artifacts of the Creature ever discovered, I believe it's binding to you was what caused the disquieting effect that was surrounding you, we really honestly have no chance of finding a new anchor that way..."

I had to ask him, "Then what can we do"

He looked over my shoulder, at the girls "We could create an anchor"....

To my credit, it took about 20 seconds to get that sick to my stomach feeling as it hit what he said "You want me to impregnate one of them?"

The Oracle, dead serious said "Your have no living souls binding you to this world, your father and sister died in that fire, and your brother...."

"I killed him...."

I had to laugh... I mean it was out of my hands, my body demanded I laugh at how stupid this idea was "Well I guess were really properly fucked then, cause I don't think Angel and Mike are going to be on board with this"

The Oracle said "It didn't have to be Angel.... I'm sure the other one could carry a child as well"

Well I stopped laughing with a coughing fit and stammered out "Wait a goddamn second, she's like... 15... that's not going to happen"

"Well back when I'm from, she would be the perfect age to marry off" The oracle said  very deadpan

I had to ask him exactly when that was, his only response was "Well the year of our lord 545", I had to remind him that in 'The year of our lord 2012' the marring age was 18..

O:"Well lets get her opinion on it"
P:"What?"
O:"Lets... Ask... Anna... How she feels about it"
P:"How-about lets not."
O:"Do you want to survive this or not?"
P:"Frankly I choose death good sir!"

We went back and forth like that for a very disturbing amount of time, when the old son of a bitch actually called her over "Child come here we must speak to you"

P:"No we don't"
O:"Don't be shy it's okay"
P:"BY ALL MEANS BE SHY!!!"

.......... So she walked over, probably out of some kind of spite towards me. "Yeah what's up"

O:"Paul needs to impregnate you"
P:"NO I CLEARLY DO NOT!!!"
O:"Paul there really is no other way, it's this or the Fading"
A:"Wha.. What the hell?"
P:"Look I don't care if the hypothetical child contains the cure for cancer in it's blood, I am not knocking anyone up to prevent my death"
A:"I'll do it!"

We both stand there shocked silent

P:"I said no, end of discussion"
A:"This will save your life though right?"
O:"She's right Paul"
P:"No both of you, there's another way, I can get the Black Bokken back from Antonio, and rebind to it"
O:"Paul right now, you don't stand a chance of defeating the this foe"
A:"And I am NOT FUCKING LOSING YOU PAUL!!!"

Anna's words shocked me silent.....

"I know that if you die to Antonio, your love may live, but we don't know if he's being honest, I know were all here now, and were all alive, I want it to stay this way" Anna is tearing up at this point "I don't care what I have to do to keep you alive Paul I'll do it!"

Shocked, Touched, and Sad, I told her to go back to Angel.... and that we'll find another way...

Then I punched the Oracle

"What the fuck is your B plan...."

The Oracle rubbed his jaw, and smiled... "Well there's one good sign to the Fading, as you get closer, and your soul becomes less and less part of this world, your physical body will gain power, and you'll be able to push the laws of the world back farther, as you get close you'll even be able to pull material, weapons, armor, and the like, from your mind, and from the Fade into this world."

So in other wards... the closer I get to the end, the more power I can throw around, in the morning, he's plans on showing me a few basic things, help guide me in a few tricks he's gained in the last well... 1500 years of himself being native to the Fade.....

But that's not all he had to say.....

"Paul.... There is one more thing" he said with a sad look in his eyes.... "It's about your friend Manic Muse"

The rest of that conversation, deserves it's own post... I'll post one about this soon.

Fading out

It's Paul... Sorry for not finishing that post last time, I ended quite abruptly,  I just didn't know how to finish it.

You see Antonio told me only final thing after he killed Roland... Which the aftermath of that was a story in of itself.

He said "I could kill you now, and fulfill my pact with the Slenderman, but I'm going to give you a chance to think it over, and choose if you want to die by my hand."

He had a sick smile on his face when he said that, that smile it burnt into my sight, but he continued

"Know that if you die by my hand, Maya will live, that was the deal I made, if I kill you with this weapon, Maya will be set free, if I die by your hand, the Slenderman will Kill her.... painfully.... in front of you, if anyone else kills me in the intern, well she'll be lost to this world forever..."

It's a sadistic choice... Damn sadistic... I die, she lives, I live... She dies....

I asfk wfasgfgggeeasdgf  SHIT.... Sorry..... I'm not in great shape right now, That Black Bokken? Well there's one thing about my Stonehenge trip that I didn't mention... My Body and Soul are not bound to this world anymore... not fully... he told me I'm tied to another world, one that lies beyond the path. but not the slender-realm... No this is farther out than the edges of our reality... it pulls me towards it... just not my hand started fading out of existence.... Those books about "The Supernatural" would call such a place the Astral plain. Bermuda Triangle bullshit and what not.

The man I went to see at Stonehenge was called the Oracle, he posted a few cryptic comments on the blog under the ???? guise in the past... He told me I had to anchor myself to the world, but such Anchors loose power during powerful cosmic events, like a Galactic Alignment that was supposed to happen in December of this year.

Now that I'm unbound to my Anchor... The Black Bokken... I have... At best a few weeks before I fade into that other world fully... maybe with training I could return from time to time, but... Well... the Oracle said it took him a few hundred years to learn how to Manifest in this world..

I got a few weeks to save Maya, and Maybe Antonio, and rebound myself to my Anchor... I don't know how I'm going to do it all... I called for the Oracle, He'll be here soon, hopefully he'll have some answers.

Ambushed

Roland is dead....

Angel was baldly hurt.....

Anna's not speaking right now, I think she hit her emotional limit...

Mike went... Somewhere, I guess he just needed some time....

Antonio is alive, And he stole the Black Bokken and caused all of the above...

I should explain... sometime yesterday,  early evening, all of us minus Roland was at a park, relaxing and getting caught up, I should have noticed the lack of other people there, the park was a popular one, and even at this time of day there should have been more people, we felt safe, and we let our guard down.

We first noticed something was wrong when I suddenly started seeing other people, looking like federal agents off in the distance, Anna and I had our bokkens because we had planed on getting some practice time in that day,  these guys, I think I heard the word "Agents" rushed in from all directions, Mike, Anna, and I responded to drive them back.

They didn't want us dead, that was clear, they didn't used any bladed weapons, or guns, they had Tazers, cattle prods, stuff that would incapacitate us without harming us severely. We drove them back, but as the last one was about to attack Anna for a take-down.... To put it politely, he imploded violently.

Anna emotionally checked out for a bit at that point, she got some of the agent on her....

The other Agents, fell back in a hurry after that, can't say I blame them, I was trying to make out who imploded that man, when I realized who it was.

Antonio... He's alive.

I ran over to him, with probably the biggest dumbest grin on my face, right when I got close, he pointed his hand at me, and I flew backwards. I had to ask at this point, "What the hell was that about?"

Antonio smiled a sadistic smile, I could have imagined this but I noticed the faint yellowish glow in his eyes.

"Sorry Paul, I'm here to kill you and take the Black Bokken"

I think my stomach hit my toes at that point, Anna and Mike were approaching, I turned to yell them fall back, but Antonio made it apparent why that would be a bad idea, he pretty much threw me at them...

.....

The rest of this gets painful.

I turned and pointed my Bokken at him, screamed how I would not use the Black Bokken, it just wasn't going to happen, I beat him down once with a normal bokken once, I could do it again...

Then my Bokken exploded, as did Anna's and Mikes training sword.

I tried to fight him barehanded, I got kicked in the ribs for my effort, punched in the face...

Antonio made it clear he wanted me to used the Black Bokken... he told me that "The Jailbait girl will die" if I didn't comply, suddenly I saw Anna Freeze in place, whimpering in pain... Antonio was slowly crushing her to death with his power!

I had no choice I reached into my coat and pulled the Black Bokken out, I took my best stance, and got ready to fight, Anna collapsed into a heap on the ground, Antonio had released her like he said he would, then he turned to attack me directly.

Frankly Antonio kicked our asses, Anna was already down, Mike went down quick, I couldn't lay a single hit on him, I swung that damn Bokken as many times as I could, he would just block it with some kind of  Telekinetic shields around his arms, I got no where fighting, Eventually I was tired, battered... unable to get to my feet..

I took one last swing at him, he caught my arm, applied pressure on in causing me to drop the Bokken. Antonio picked it up of course, and it felt like the second he picked it up, that all the evil on earth was just pulled into that damn thing....

Angel and Ryan came running up, Roland pointed his gun at Antonio and ordered him to drop the weapon and get down, hands behind his head... Standard cop stuff.

Roland, I swore at that point he would by the guy who turned the fight around.... I was on my back, Couldn't even move... Antonio just pointed the Bokken at not him, but Angel....

I don't know how to describe the next part... it was like the blade expanded...  in a beeline towards Angel, Roland pushed her aside, but the Bokken tore right through his chest.... and still got Angel in the process, just non fatally....

Antonio killed Roland, and beat the hell out of the rest of us.... I don't know why,

I just don't know why....

Dead Ends...

I spent the last couple days trying to followup on leads on Maya, but I haven't had any luck. I went to place we had gone before, spent half a day reading TV tropes on a bench at the water front in the off chance she went there... swung by our old apartment building, late at night of course. Our favorite hang outs...

Nothing....

I'm starting to think the rumor was bullshit, I really am, like someone was, not baiting me back to Tacoma, I mean otherwise I would have heard something before this, but I get the impression someone is being baited, and Maya is the bait.

Mike, Roland, and Angel have all been minimally involved, the less they get dragged into this, the easier it will be to push them out if shit goes tits up around here.

For now, unless something happens or I'm contacted, I'm going to assume that Maya either wanted space, or the rumor is bullshit.


The thing is, I think I'm being followed as well, I keep seeing this blonde guy, casual wear but screams "I am an undercover agent", It might be unrelated, or it might mean I have a time limit in town....

I'll keep you posted if I learn anything new.

Reconnection

Wow a second post in two days is this what stability is doing to me?

I did my normal morning spars with Anna earlier today, when Michael came out with a  wooden blade of his, more of a European style, I believe a long sword..

Michael is a competitive level Fencer, and he wanted to test my skills like the old days.  I'm going to try to recall what we said, keep in mind were dueling the whole time.

M: "So Paul, lets see if you've been staying up to speed on your training."
P: "I know you don't believe me Mike, but it's all true, there's shit going on I hope I can keep you all out of."
M: "Look it's not that I don't believe you, but do you really expect me to believe that there's a secret war out there between normal people and servants of this monster your talking about"
P: "It seems unlikely right? I mean I didn't believe it at first, I thought I was just going crazy, I actually thought Maya was a stranger, an enemy, and Antonio... forget it, some creepy asshole who was working for them, god I was so convinced of it all"

I took a harder swing than I intended to, and got Michael in the ribs with my Shinai, he steps back for a second holding his side wincing

P: "Well you swordplay is has definitely taken a turn for the aggressive, hey if you need our help you know were here for you"
M: "That's the thing, it's too dangerous, I almost died several times since this started, I would be putting you all at grave risk, you all may very well die!"

I got sloppy and found myself put as sword point by Michael

M: "To late my friend, I talked to Roland already looked into your claims, he saw the report about the Assault on your apartment, your disappearance, allot of people died in your building when that happened, that's the only reason he wanted us to let you stay here so he could talk to you about it."
P: "The man behind the attack is already dead, I killed him, I already told you that"

Michael lowered his wooden sword.

M: "Thats the problem, that's street justice, that's not how things work, I found the news report on the warehouse explosion, there only found one body, but you sounded really and honestly shocked that we mentioned that Maya was back in town. Why is that Paul? Did something happen?"

I sit down against a post, take a long drink from my water bottle, The hurt left was clear in my voice as the words left my mouth.

P: "Maya and Antonio went into that warehouse with me, I was the only one to get out of there, if they found another way out, why didn't they contact me before now, why wait almost two months without a word, Its not like I didn't have a blog or something I could have been found through."

Michael sits next to me, I thought I had seen Angel watching from inside the apartment, I know she doesn't trust me.

M: "Well the holy shit creepy vibe you got going, the missing eye, and the fact you look like a bum, that screams you went through a hard time, maybe they didn't have a means of reaching out to you, maybe they were on there way back this way expecting you to come back here."

Anna came out and brought us both some breakfast, someone made steak and eggs for breakfast, it's been a while since I ate actual food.

M: "Let me help, I don't care if Roland and Angel don't help, the two of us can beat any chalenges that come our way, wasn't that how it was at Atlas?"

We ate in silence while I pondered his words.....

Back in Tacoma.... Shits Getting Real...

We made it back yesterday, I quickly got in touch with some friends, and found couch for the two of us to stay on until we reestablish ourselves in town...

3 friends of mine, all roommates, Roland, a Tacoma Police officer, Michael, who works at a local gaming store, and his girlfriend Angel (I don't think that's her real name) who is apparently a registered nurse...

So, a bad ass, a nerd, and a medic....

It's bad I'm labeling people in terms of combat usefulness, I've been fighting for too long....

Well lets just say there's three questions I'm already tired of...

"What the fuck happened to your eye!?!"
"Where the fuck have you been!?!"
"Who's the Jail-bait?"

Jokingly I answered "Combine accident, Cairo murdering the president of Spain with a fork, and my 'Professional style' student in the ancient art of assassination"

They were not amused.... so I told them the truth

"I got my eye ripped out by a man who brainwashed me into thinking I was married with child, and was also my brother, I was in Pittsburgh hunting him down so I could kill him with a super evil black Bokken, and this girl was rescued from the monster that my brother served, and joined me to get away from an abusive family"

Oddly enough they thought that story was the less likely of the two.... But all of them kept there distance, except Angel who check my eye every once in a while and suggested that I "eat more" or "get more sleep"

 However... there has been one thing I need to followup on... this is critical... A rumor that Roland had told me....

He said that he had heard that Maya was back on town.... I need to investigate this right now...

More nightmares

I'm going to post this straight... take a page from Lucia or something....

Adrenaline pumping, the evil weapon just crushed the head of Ryan, victory at last, but the explosions, I have lived this moment a hundred times in a loop already, I try anything to get them out ahead of me, every time I hear her scream. I hear her scream "Wait!" did that happen last time? Am I making stuff up now?

This time I wait... I wait for her to catch up, she has knife in hand, she plunges it into my stomach, as parts of the warehouse falls, I feel her hand, pulling into my stomach, I feel her pull my guts, I hear her whisper "I hate you" and "You disgust me" telling my in the sweetness of her voice how "You let me die, you failed us both" and "Your just going to let the girl die too"

I lay there, her face contorted, burned half off, most of her hair gone, holding my intestines in her hand, pulling them out slow, Now I see Antonio... half his head is gone, crushed off "You failed us Paul, you should have stayed" 

I didn't notice he was holding my eye... the one I lost, I wonder how "We can kill you now so you can join us" they say...

My only response is "Thank you" as they pull me apart....

Then I woke up feeling a weight on me, Anna was laying on my back keeping me wraped up in my bedroll, I guess I started flailing a bit and woke her up, and she was hoping I'd calm down, she sat up and asked if I wanted to talk about it.

Maya used to do that, and the fact Anna was starting to remind of Maya was really disturbing me.

"There getting worse" I mention

"I can tell" she replies "But you were going to hurt yourself like that"

I tell her about the dream, I'm crying openly, because at some level, I wished that had happened, that I'm just going to get her killed, that anyone traveling with me is going to be killed.

She just listens, then sits by me and hugs me as I bury my head in my hands, having the worst freak out in weeks, the damn broke with the dream... I scream, I rage... I hate... I let all the pain out.... she just listens and understands....

I make an oath... I will never call the Black Bokken out... I will never used that thing I used to kill with... I'll die first....

I know I still have a long way to go, these freakouts are no longer being the little tremors that they were... there like magnitude 8.0 earthquakes....

But maybe that just means I'm finally letting it all escape, to purge the pain from me, rather than let it bleed out.

I don't like not being in control, but I now know what I have to do... I have to go back to Tacoma...

We leave tomorrow....

Peace unfulfilled

It's amazing what sitting against the rock staring at the sea as dawn breaks can do for one's soul.

Anna and I have now been here several days, she's trying to be as supportive as she could be, I still feel like I need to keep her skills up, but it's not for the desperate reasons I had before, it's not out of anger like it was before...

I wonder if I'm coming to terms with everything.

I still have the nightmares, and I still barely sleep... I don't feel like I've done anything to be forgiven for my crimes... I'm still baddy repressing allot of the pain for the sake of being the tough stoic son of a bitch Anna needs me to be right now.

As much as she doesn't admit to it... She's scared..... We both are... I'm scared that I'm going to get her killed... She's scared that her dying will kill me...

Pretty justified all things considered.

We haven't seen any sign of Slendy or any proxies right now... which is good... I definitely don't need that... but about half an hour ago I saw that Sane might be dead right now... Gargoyle is going fucking insane... and Lucia is still burdened by grief...

Then I realize that were going to loose more before the end....

The thoughts make me tempted, tempted to never leave the beach, but we can't do that, were going to have to travel again sooner rather than later....

I have unfinished business of course.....

But I'm not ready to leave... I need more time, and I plan on taking it....

I can't leave here until I can finally close my eye without seeing there faces....

That Akward moment.....

So I'm breaking my self imposed silence... because we for the first time in a number of weeks we had a good laugh... It actually started when someone asked me a question about our trip to hope...

"So how did you get past the electric fence and wall"

To which I replied, to Anna who was reading as well... "What fence in wall"

Anna started cracking up right away... turned out she didn't have the heart to tell me this. but we actually had ended up in some burnt out shell of a some Basketball players summer home that burnt down a couple months back.....

Kinda undermined the lesson I was trying to instill....

Well that is all, just wanted to get that out of the way... so well... peace out until next time.

It's Time to Rest.....

So apparently it's a good thing we didn't stay in Texas....

Because Yet another person has decided that I've lived long enough and has opted that, well god damn it, it's just time for me to die... Hope he's patient... because it feels like I'm collecting people wanting me dead like most people collect baseball cards.

However unlike most of those people, this one could actually pull it off....

So well I'm taking the advice of others for once... and I'm going into seclusion for the time being... I'm not telling where, but for the sake if what Anna keeps telling me is good for my mental health, I need to do this....

I'm going into hiding, to mourn... I mean properly mourn... No more running... No more driving... No more fighting... I just found a nice place by the water... no people... no cars... barely good enough of a connection to post this.... and I'm going to mourn.....

For Maya....

For Antonio....

For Father....

For Sister....

For Mother.....

For Ryan.... Both of them....

For Manic... if he's really gone forever....

For my neighbors....

For Sara if she was real....

For my Wife and Son... even if they were never real....

For Zeke... for Elaine... and all of those runner I never had the chance....

For Anna... who really didn't deserve this...

For Coworkers who died having never knew why

For neighbors, even if I didn't care for them much....

And for all of us left behind now that there gone......

I don't know when I'll start driving again... I don't know how long I'll need... We got enough food and clean water for a few weeks... And some camping supplies... the car has a charger for our phones and my Tablet...

I just need some rest... for the first time in my life, I feel old... and that's not a good thing.

As of right now....

Anna is hereby mandated to not allow me access to the tablet while drunk....

That is all....

A little place called "Hope"

So... yeah...

I know it seems like I've been distant in recent blogs, writing like I'm observing what's happening rather than my feelings about it... I do spend allot of time writing about shit that's happened...

I guess I'm documenting all of this, in case the worst happens someone can learn from all of this. Anna is okay today... she's been pretty freaked out the last few days of course... we really don't often travel with a destination in mind, just as long as were moving is fine for us... I know a few of you are asking why I haven't mentioned my family lately... Lets just say I'm not blogging everything that happens...

About a week ago... I learned my father and sister were killed in a freak fire at the restaurant... I truly can not go home anymore.... I don't sleep... I don't have proof that they died because of me... but... well fuck it... my pain is not going to written up and put on display for everyone to see.

Dad... Kaitlyn... Antonio... Maya... And everyone else that died around me lately.... I shoulder the blame, even if it wasn't my hand that killed them....

It's hard to type.. the kid went to sleep early.. and sometimes I can't express my feelings well... this is one of those times....

Since February everyone I cared about, real or otherwise, has been taken from me... It was with this in mind that I decided I had to teach Anna probably the most important lesson I could teach her, and to do this, We having driving to Austin Texas for the last week or so...

We drove to the place once called "Hope". For those of you don't know about this place, Hope was once the a summer home, gifted to the now deceased runner Elaine. Honestly it was kinda like Antithesis, only for Runners It was supposed to be the perfect rest stop for Runners needing a place to be... yet today, we walked through the still burnt out shell of the place... walked amongst the ruins...

Anna asked me what happened as I sat down in there, took a drink from the flask I stared caring on me, shit can you blame me for needing a drink now and then? Helps the Stimulants I'm taking go down better, I told her the truth, this place, was a place for hope for Runners... sure the person who set it up was an idiot... but there were good intentions here....

She asked me how it ended... I told her the one mistake Elaine had made... She trusted a Proxy... A servant of the Slenderman to keep the place safe, she made a deal with the same assholes hunting us, and she broke the deal...

"As you can see kiddo... This was the result... Allot of good people were killed by the Slenderman and his servants.... We don't make deals with them... this is the only way it can end"

Anna sure gave me a stern look wanting me to explain Lucia and Ryan. What the fuck was there to say... yeah they made a great couple, and on many levels, I considered her Ryan to be the exception to the rule, d I wished nothing but the best for Lucia... but her boyfriend made a living by killing Runners, when a blog stopped suddenly, there was a good change someone like him was why.

Hey you guys wanted me to open up with my emotions, to get it out of my system? Your going to read it as I see it, I don't give a fuck how much I had to drink tonight... fuckers like them killed Maya... they killed Antonio... They try to kill Anna and I on a pretty regular basis...

You guys want me to stop seeing this as a fucking war, to realize that there are not different sides to this? well lets do a comparison between war and our situation... We have a clear enemy who would kill us in a heartbeat, kill us because there leader tells them to kill us, we see our friends die daily, we fight, or we die... just because we don't have a fucking flag and a little boy with some drums, doesn't mean this isn't a war.

I know this now more than ever to be the truth...

Hey I'm sorry, not all of us have working relationships with them, not all of us can get away with working "Fosters home for Brutal Violent Slenderman Powered Murderers".

Anna's pissed, wants me ease off the drink... hey this is the first time in days we didn't have to get up and drive first thing in the morning... I'm having a fucking drink tonight.... what about Antonio? Wasn't he a proxy she says? He choose to betray them for us, as far as I'm concerned, he was a runner with some tricks...

Proxies Killed Maya....
Proxies Killed Antonio ....

Proxies killed "Hope".....

And I sure as fuck didn't ask for any of it, I'm sure Anna didn't either, I didn't want to bury every friend and living family member I had left, before I turned 31.... Do you fucks thinks I wanted to end up a fucking half-dead freak? Wanted my fucking eye gouged out? Wanted this fucking Bokken? I sure as fuck didn't... I wanted none of this.. I wanted a normal life... Just Maya... and Me....

I don't get to fucking have that now, so excuse me if I get in the Habit of killing the type of people responsible, and for teaching others how to kill them... Sane was right, I needed to stop blaming myself... I needed to start blaming them..........

**********************************

This is Anna... he just tossed me the tablet and went off into the dark.. away from camp.... I guess he wants me to wrap this blog post up... he's really not himself tonight... sorry if he offended anyone but he just learned his family died a few days ago... and well I don't know how much more of this he's going to be able to withstand

I'm learning to fight, but I know at times like this I keep him alive... He's honestly self destructive, but he won't die and leave me alone...

Don't be to harsh on him... He's all I have left, and I'm all he has left... we really do take care of each other the best we can... he did admit to me that the day he found me... he had plans on killing himself in those woods if the Slenderman didn't find him... He saved me life and I'm saving his everyday... but hell lets face facts, in the short time I've known him, he's been a better "dad" to me than my real "father"... anyone who gives Paul shit has to deal with me too now.

We Are Being Hunted Without Mercy

Now that I have your attention lets set up the scene...

It was about two days ago.. Anna and I were watching some bull shit on Tv, when someone kicks the door off the hotel room floor hard enough that it went through the back wall, strangely intact... and he says one thing,


"FATHER REQUESTS THAT YOU DIE!!!!"


And then we both notice the flamethrower... Because yeah, no one in this backwater shit hole thought it was weird that someone was walking around the hotel with a WW2 style flamethrower...  So I toss her in the tub and throw a bed in front of me just before he lets loose hell and sets half the fucking room on fire, we know we can't beat this guy in this tight of a spot, not with that hellish thing strapped to him... Anna was faster on her feet than me, and went out the hole in the back of the wall, and to be fair, for falling about 20 feet landed well, only a few small scrapes.


I land after her and roll to put my coat out as it caught a bit of flame as I went out the window....


The crazy fucker, wearing about 60 lbs of napalm on his back actually jumped out after us, I had my Bokken our by the point, and Anna and ducked behind a parked car... To say it was tricky getting in close to the asshole was putting it mildly, I just couldn't close distance before the flames drove us back.... I thought we were truly and properly fucked....


The Bokken disagreed... I felt that tingling in my arm... it was growing into me again... feeding my limbs with strength... but I still don't know at what cost... I felt myself slip slightly out of control and more into instinct... I leaped, must of been about 12 feet in a single bound, right into striking range, and with one swing,  the Proxies arm came off... I mean the whole fucking thing tore off him at the shoulder... I know it's not possible for blunt for trauma from a normal person to inflict this kind of damage, unless it was strapped to a fucking train..... The second swing, even less under my control went for the head... It fucking exploded off of him....


We had to leave right there and then... I tore the bokken out of my arm again... and yeah it hurt just as much as it did last time... I looted a sawed off shotgun and some shells... 12 gauge slug rounds... and a few flechete rounds which, are restricted in several states, and are holy shit expensive, about $20.00 for a 3 pack, and this guy and about 20 shells of these. to put this in perspective, about a 12 slug rounds cost about $15.00 or so....


Anyways, I took the gun, I wasn't getting caught off guard like that again by a ranged combatant... Anna was honestly in shock.. I didn't realize how much blood was on me while I dragged her to the car.... we got the fuck out of there....


So it's been a couple days... were not on the wanted pages, but Anna decided it's not safe for us to stay in once place for long... the Slenderman seems to want me dead, but doesn't want to do it himself for some reason...

Crash course

Man this kid cracks me up sometimes....

I decided that the kid is going to need some serious combat training after a couple days ago when I woke her help by flipping her bed screaming "ATTACK ME DAMMIT" at the top of my lungs....

And she freaked out and flailed at me about as well as I expected a 15 year old too... which is to say... yeah this kid needs to learn allot, like from the ground up...

When we were not on the road, I've been training her to fight, Just a few things at the time... Starting at the basics, how to throw a punch, she picked up that quickly, at least I don't have to worry her about breaking her thumbs now, though I don't think she's getting behind the part where I started having punching into sandbags to harder up her knuckles quite yet. She's getting good at evading attacks as well. That is unless I stop pulling my speed and toss a full speed punch at her to keep her alert... I know I'm being hard on her, but she *will* die if I don't toughen her up...

I also started teaching her the bare basics of Akido and Kendo, which I'm more or less instructor level in both. for now, she's mostly working on foot movements, and forward rolling in Akido, and as for Kendo, I'm teaching her basic Kata's right now, and the 8 basic swings. Were both using Shinai's, also known as those Bamboo swords you see in anime, great for training, because they don't hurt, we don't have armor, but hell I didn't study with armor either, and pain is a great way to teaching someone to dodge or parry.

Meditation and breathing exercises are also going well, she's understanding quickly the importance of keeping calm and your allowing yourself to clear her head during training, to basically not over think it..

She calls it "channeling her inner airhead" Hey whatever works... Whiles we drive, she reads blogs, absorbs information about the threat were fleeing from, learning everything she can, EverymanHybrid, the Tutorial, learning about the big names, Elaine, Zeke, Dr Cairo, Noah...

Hell she's even learning from Gargoyle and Sane's blogs.... and with all due respect, there fucking crazy nuts... in a good way.

But she also read my blog... she had quite a few questions about me after that...  She asked a few questions I really wasan't ready to answer yet.

A:Does your family know what's going on?
P:No it's for the best there not part of this.
A:So was Ryan really your brother?
P:Yeah the Slenderman confirmed that truth.
A:Do you blame yourself for all those deaths that Ryan caused
P: ....... No comment.......
A:Do you blame your self for Maya and Antonio
P:Change the subject.........
A:It wasn't your fault Pa-
P:CHANGE THE FUCKING SUBJECT!!!!

I didn't handle it well obviously......

Right now were both on the roof of the Hotel were staying at, our stuff is in the car, the sky is clear, and were barely need the blankets here, She's meditating under the moonlight, and to be honest, she actually is starting to look the part of the runner, her bruises are mostly gone, and she now has a short sword of her own, I leaning against a wall, typing this out on a blue-tooth keyboard I managed to get a hold of for the Tablet.

Would I be alive right now if I didn't have her to protect? That's the one question I didn't have a problem answering...

"No Anna... I don't believe I would be"

"Well Batman, I guess I better not pull a Tim Drake on you then"

"Didn't they retcon his death?"

"You can't retcon real life Paul"

"No.. no you can't......"

About Lucia and Ryan.

Not to us this time... This time it happened to a friend of mine, someone who had been great to Antonio and Maya while I was off in Sanctuary.... Tripling on that sweet revenge kick...

Lucia's soon to be husband Ryan is dead.....

Some Muttmen, from what I had gathered was basically some kind of Proxy for the Rake... killed him...

Shit I'm resisting the urge to go back and kill them, were only maybe a hundred or so miles away at this point, at small town called Moundsville... they had a cheep hotel in the area, and a great place for the two of us to plan our next move...


Because I'm not going to drive around the Midwest like some dumb ass and waste a metric shit ton of gas in the process.

Anna, the little dork that she is, actually suggested we go to New England, because hell lets drive up to the neck of the woods where you know, the Cthulhu Mythos is based out of... that's a great idea!

Anyways she's sitting in her bed (Yes I paid for two beds in this room) asking why I'm being quiet... I mean it's great to have a company on my strange journey... but how do I explain that a friend and ally that I actually never met is dead... and that I'm upset about this...

I'm upset because it's a reminder what could happen to all of us... I'm upset because I already lost two friends this week that I only mentioned when she asked who the bloody coat belonged to...I'm upset because this poor girl probably won't live to see 18 if she keeps traveling with me..

Loosing friends I figure, brings out these kinda thoughts in people... I'm going to end this post on that, I'm going to make the kid sleep, and I'm probably going to read a book... I don't sleep anymore if I can help it.....


Bad dreams........

Given a choice

So the girl and I had a talk after she woke up, Sane had dropped the idea that if she was interested in getting "Out" of this before she ever became "In" this shit storm we all collectively live in, that he could alter her memories of the last day so she could just go home and live a normal life. Well I had actually recorded, with consent, our conversation so I could notate it later, picture if you will the two of us in a wooded clearing near another of Pittsburgh's parks.


P: Look kid you just had one hell of a rude awaking, in one morning you just learned that monsters are real, and that magic exists on this world, a really horrible thing that no one so far in all of human history has been able to find a way to beat, but you also learned that there is potential in man to become something both greater and worse than it self... one of my associates is offering to help you forget this if you choose

A: You mean like brainwashing?

P: Well.. I won't lie that's about the jist of it yes, but you'll forget this ever happened, you'll be able to go home again, the creature that attacked you won't find you again if you forget about him...

A: What happens if I choose to remember today?

P: You end up like me, hell you end up like hundreds of other people, constantly on the run, fleeing from both the creature, or it's very human minions, you might learn to fight back, but most of us die in pretty horrible ways...Maybe you'll help try to figure it out via experiments, maybe you'll go mad while doing so and loose a piece of your self, maybe you'll end up surrendering yourself to it.  Or maybe You will find yourself sheltering it's servants... Or  maybe you will die protecting those you care about most.... It's honestly not a plesent life you would be setting yourself up for, and to be honest, if someone have given me the choice back then, I would have taken it.

A: I'll keep my memories....

P: What? Kid were you just listening to what I said? This life is terrible, we live in fear every god damn day, I lost an eye to this thing already, I also lost my home, my life, this shit striped me of everything I cared about.... Everything.... What could you possibly find worse that all of this that make you want to stay apart of it?

Anna lifts takes off her coat, revealing dark bruises on her arms, especially telling were the ones on her wrists... She was being abused by someone? A boyfriend? a parent?

P: those look pretty severe kiddo, who's doing this to you?

She looks to the side... under her hair is a bruise like a bite.... my skin crawls...

A: It doesn't matter, I can't go back to that life... not when I know I can escape from it....

I lean back against the tree I'm sitting by and look up at the branches... I can't force her to go back somewhere she doesn't want to be, but taking an untrained rookie with me, now that I just seriously pissed off the Slenderman?

Just after I already killed my friends?

P:  okay maybe I can find a Runner safe-house to drop you at then, I mean you can't come back here that's for sure, you'll just be putting others at risk and-

A: I'm going with you!

P:  Kid I'm not staying in town, to be fair, I'm not leaving newbie in town either, this are is practically ground zero for the creature's activities, there are more of it's minions per square miles here than almost anywhere else I know of.

A: Well touch shit old man, you saved my life, I'm your problem now! You can't just be all like Superman, save the day and fly off leaving us behind! Your Batman, and I'm Dick-Fucking-Grayson to you now! 

P: Okay, first off, who the hell is Dick Grayson, and second off, don't call me old man.... I mean don't you think it's going to, oh I don't know, roll up in a hotel with a girl half my fucking age?

A: Your a smart looking guy, figure it out... So when are we leaving?

I lost that argument right about the time she made started comparing me to a  superhero... yeah I figured the whole saving her life thing was a good thing, but in typical fashion I didn't think it through... I started off by handing her Maya's cellphone which was in the car, my number was already in it so if we became separated she could contact me, I also made it clear that she was going to have to learn quick, probably quicker than most since she was traveling with an established threat to the Slenderman and it's minions.

But were on our way out of town, destination unknown, I considered going back to Tacoma, but I think that would just be to risky right now....

He's pissed...

And by He, I mean the 11 foot tall faceless asshole that tried to kill me several times in the last couple hours....

Okay explanation time before he shows up again....

I was woken up kinda early today, about 7am, under the tree I feel asleep under by the sound of a young girl screaming... I sit up, stash my bag and look around, guess what I see?

I see the fucking Slenderman in the.... what ever the fuck he's made out of, arms outstretched, mentally controlling a girl who, after a lengthy running argument as to why she should be, should have been on her way to school at that point.

Because kids who skip school die horribly in the tentacled arms of the fucking Slenderman!

Well of course I can't take this sitting down, I get up, pull out the Black Bokken from my backpack and charge headlong into the fray, I mean people without freaky evil super sticks do this all the time, so hell lets do this...

the whole thing feels like it's in slow motion, I leap in the area and swat one of it's tentacles just as it was about to wrap around her chest, the tentacle recoiled back and boy... well lets say for something that didn't have facial features he really made me feel hated at that moment.

It's almost like... like it hurt, or what passes for hurt, but I'm not thinking at that point, I'm swinging away, striking tentacles back, standing between it and the girl, each tentacle recoils back with each hit. These anit love taps I hitting him with, each of these swings could break a person's skull open, or break an arm, and he's reacting like it stings.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, FUCKING RUN!!!" I scream at the kid pushing her as we run for it.

I felt a burning weight slam into my back as we turn, I push the kid to keep going while I back peddle striking back at it's tentacles... while this is happening I feel a curious tingle in my wrist, not painful, but a definite burning sensation.

Eventually it Retracted all it's tentacles and looked like it was about to hit me with something savage, I took this opportunity to grab the girl by the arm and run for it.

God... I'm going to have nightmares about the rest of this, he was behind every tree, around every corner swinging a tentacle at me. by this point that sensation was up to my elbow, my strikes felt like they had more force behind them, despite dragging the girl by one arm...

That went on like that for over an hour... we eventually found a spot to rest after he stopped his attack... I found myself unable to put down the Bokken during that first post, I had the girl type it for me on my tablet while I took watch... Then at the end of the alley we were sitting in I fucking see him, again! he just starts, like a god damn spider propelling itself down the Alley at us with it's tentacles, we make for the main road and round the corner just in time to dodge the freaking dumpster it tossed at us into the middle of the road...

The chase was on again, and we were getting to tired to run... I made a choice... I told her to keep running down the road while I waited for it to pass by again... when it passed me after all, I jumped out behind him and swatted it in the head...

And he vanished like smoke...  I caught up with the girl... we found a wide open park to sit after stashing my Bokken again... Oh yeah that bears mentioning, at the end the burning feeling in my arm was almost to my shoulder, let me explain why..

Because the fucking thing was growing roots into my arm! the second I let go, they tore out of me... Violently... there was allot of blood, but where I expected my arm to be shredded... there were no wounds or scars... that was... interesting...

So as I type this up, I'm explaining again why her education is important and that she really shouldn't be skipping class, I mean it's not like Summer Vacation isn't a few weeks out... But hey she's not listening, probably due to the shock of it all... At least I got a name out of her. Her name is Anna, and I was wrong, she's 15... not that it maters.

Wow.. I just realized she has no idea what the hell is going on, and I get to crash course her in the supernatural... Awesome.....

ShitShitShitShitShitSHIIIIIIIIIIIIT

Okay So in my typical patented fashion... I did two things that are as most would describe as brain-numbingly stupid...

I didn't take the advice of the people leaving comments on my blog....

And I just smacked the ever loving shit out of the Slenderman with a stick, that may very well be made out of pure evil... Yeah on a scale of one to ten on how stupid that was in hindsight... I'm going to say about 13....

Okay I had a reason for this... and it now leads to why I have a 14 year old girl hiding out in the same allyway as... FUCK HES BACK BRB!!!

Shit out of friends

I spent the last night waiting for an attack that never came, I suppose I should be pleased by this, but lets face facts... a big part of me was hoping for an ending....

I guess I need to keep waiting... the only thing living I encountered last night was a transient, and his only reaction was to freak out and run... I guess I have that effect on people...

So I went digging... just digging....

Sorry if this post seems a bit dull, I mean I haven't had any sleep in days... I can't sleep, I have to keep Vigil in case a proxy attacks, or if Maya and Antonio show up hurt, and they need my help... I've always been a heavy sleeper, so I guess I don't want to sleep right now and miss something important.

Well the transient's stash of random uppers and caffeine pills have been helping me stay awake. I guess the other reason I don't want to sleep is every time I close my eye... I think of the possibilities.... I see images... there lifeless bodies, tortured... violated...

Or even worse... I see that they died, and the last thing of me they saw was me getting out of the warehouse before they could... that the last thing they see was me run....

I guess this is a pretty nasty case of survivor's guilt... topped off with a helping of remorse for ever getting them involved....

I guess I know there not coming back now.. I found... a few things in there... Maya's coat... splattered with blood... Antonio's Watch... shattered, the time frozen at the point where the explosion hit..... No body... probably won't find one.. that warehouse was a couple stories... and if they were taken from there, then they were killed...

Antonio didn't get out of there, he didn't teleport himself and Maya out... or they would have contacted me by now...

So here I am, an enemy of the Slenderman, Alone in his stronghold, Proxy-town USA... with a few trinkets reminding myself as to what I lost to this god-forsaken city...

I'm going to the park now... I figure somewhere where his prey, and a bunch of tree's is a great place to spend some quiet time to think things over.

Fuck it all...

Tomorrow is going to be five days since Maya Antonio and I went to war.....

Tomorrow is going to be five days since I came out alone from that war....

I've been holding out in Pittsburgh watching news reports of the explosion and lurking from a distance watching them remove the rubble... so far they have only pulled one on body.. I recognized it as Ryan.... They haven't pulled anyone else out yet...  No one has come out of there alive in 5 days.....

I mean this is how I'm spending my days... sitting... watching people clear out the debris... praying for their bodies to be pulled from the ruins... Alive or dead...

Because at that point at least I'll know if there okay...

I'm going to stay, until every last scrap of building is cleared... and when the work crews retire for the night, I'll go in and dig myself.... Because I let them down.. I could of dragged them to the Sanctuary.. or used my increased strength to carry them out or....

Anything but run blindly for the exit...

God damn it all... I really fucking failed hard.... I mean even if I sedated them like I had planed.. maybe it would have worked out in the end.... I haven't seen the inside of the Hotell in a few days.. been sleeping under the stars.. near the warehouse... I don't plan on leaving... not to eat... not to drink... if I die on this roof... then so be it...

Actually, lets follow this one step forward... Hey proxy fucks! Here's where I am! You know I killed one of your own! I won't run! COME FUCKING GET SOME.... YOU WANT ME DEAD? THEN FUCKING BRING IT ON!!!!!

Hey I see your boss watching me, why don't you come show off for him! We'll have a party on the roof! and see how many of you it takes to finally bring me down!

Not Dead After All

Paul here... taking up my writing position for the time being again....

Here's a lesson to other bloggers... don't forget to deleted a pending post if you didn't decide to go through with it... I didn't sedate Maya or Antonio... I let them come with me in the end....

That was a mistake.....


The whole affair was brutal as shit... spYder was held up in a warehouse, one of those abandoned kinds you know? We get the drop on them, crashing a "Borrowed Van" Through there front doors. We flood out and start the attack right away...

I went for Ryan, who had as some point purchased a broadsword... he wasn't bad with it either, I had to go on the defensive almost straight away... his swings were skilled, but sloppy... his strikes had allot of strength behind the.... I almost died several times and got a few light cuts during the fight.

Antonio stood there in a bright circle... and took on the Shadowman, every time the shadow would come out to strike Antonio would be ready to strike back... I would have him explain but.....

I'll get back to that... Maya took on the Sledgehammer girl, which I learned was a woman named Sara... He where did I here that name before... oh yeah... Ryan's "Missing girlfriend".... Asshole... She did an amazing job against her, really used her speed to avoid her wide swings with the sledge... the problem was, us males would be slowly creeping in her direction.... towards her voice... lowering our guard just enough to get cheep shots in from our attackers... I'm pretty glad Maya was keeping her tied up so she couldn't use that voice to lull us into a quick death...

I was so focused on taking out Ryan once and for all, that I didn't see when the others won there fight... while I was barely able to keep pace with Ryan... I mean crap I'm a walking dead... I have super powers but I could keep pace with him... then I thought about it.... He had said something before the fight

"Hey Paul look what I got, remember our boffering days? This should be interesting right?"

I was being brainwashed... Shit that had to be it.. it said something to convince me he was me equal in a sword fight... the second I realized it, his sloppy swings, his half arsed evasions... that was why, he wasn't better than me, my mind was making me weaker... knowing this... suddenly he stopped being hard, I was on the offense and frankly kicking his ass... with one swing I broke his arm, a second swing took out his knee...

The last swing shattered his skull... and killed him outright....

Just before he died he started smiling... he had one last trap for us...

Sure enough right as he died... we started hearing pops... explosions... beeps... he had the whole building on a fucking deadman's switch.....

I got out of the building... I didn't see Maya or Antonio outside with me.... I spent as long as I could digging around inside the wreckage before the police and fire sirens started howling in the distance... I made my escape at that point....

I don't know if there alive or dead... but I'm sitting in this Hotell room alone now... my rage spent... my Enemies dead... but I'm alone right now... I might of led my love and best friend to there deaths... If that's the case.. I'll never forgive myself for it...

Now I'm just waiting...

For Lucia and Sane

Look... I'm pretty bad at this sort of thing, more so since... well I died...

But I didn't get a chance to think either of you for watching after my friends after what happened... I guess I was to busy being a selfish asshole to take care of them myself, I guess maybe I forgot how to feel for a while...

Yeah by the time you read this.. I went to go pick a fight... without Maya and Antonio... Yeah I'm a jackass but I figure they'll be safe if they stay behind...  I'm still being selfish... I'm not going to this fight alone for there sake, I'm doing it for me... I want Ryan dead... and I already said it once.

"No one dies for me"

In the end, I brought them into this mess, I'm letting them out of it... If I make it back, I'm definitely hanging up the Bokken, I'm going to find a quiet place to put down roots, where no one knows any of us, and were just going to live in peace, until the time that I was told my life would end.... I'm going to forget about the Slenderman, about the Proxies... about this blog... I'm going to find a Job, try to start a family with Maya... and just forget about the whole god damn world until the time comes.

Right now there resting... they didn't know I spiked that last drink with a sleeping aid... and I got "?????" watching the place for me... yeah I know who he is... and that's a secret just for me alone who that is.

Sane... For what it's worth... I'm sorry about Manic... I didn't want the worst to happen to him... but hell, if I told him everything I remember from beyond the path... I doubt his mind you of survived it... Take care of Kat, what little time I spent talking to her, I could tell that she cared for Manic...

Manic told me that he thought my sword... this animal carved from what he called "The bleeding tree" could possibly hurt the Slenderman, well I don't know about that... But I know it can hurt a proxy.. which is good enough for me... It's too dangerous to use anyways... I feel like it's alive.....

Lucia... I wanted to thank you, Maya and Antonio said you really gave them hope in finding me alive and well... it really means allot to me that they had such a great friend in Pittsburgh, I mean that... You even took Antonio in while Maya was healing... I really hope it works out for you and Ryan... I want nothing but happiness for you... now and always.

Maya... I owe you more than I could owe anyone.. I love you so very much, even if I haven't shown it much the last few days... if I make it back, you better believe I'm going to make it up to you...

Antonio... Watch your back while your out there, if the Organization, is after you again... you'll need all the help you can get... and take care of Maya...

Well that's it from me... in a few hours this will post... long after anyone can talk me out of it... good luck to you all.

This is it....

A pile of rocks.....

That's what Stonehenge is to me, and I haven't a damn clue what Paul was hoping to find over there... he didn't explain to me at first what he went there for... but he came back with answers... chilling answers....

"Assuming I'm alive by then... I'm going to die again on the 12/21/12"

I looked at him like he was fucking daft... How can anyone say that with such certainly is beyond me at this point... but then he continued...

"But I'm going to do something, die for something, important beyond all of us"

Again he said this with such certainty, it was chilling... he didn't say why he felt this way, or what he encountered while he was out there... but he looked more "alive" than he had in the entire time he had been back with us.....

Well... if he's right... then were going to make the best we can in what time we have yet.... Once our business is done, were going to go get married.


.........................


Well in other news at least, Antonio came through again, he examined that... goop... that he had found at some of Paul's teleporting sites... and well... Paul's not leaving it behind... When Paul left for Stonehenge, he didn't leave any of it behind.

So Antonio figured something else was leaving it at the scene... and we got our answer...

It's because it was being left behind by spYder... Yeah... He was stalking Paul this whole time.....

Antonio thinks he has enough to tie it down to Ryan's psychic signature... with a few little gadgets he had picked up... we tracked him down to a location, we might be able to storm there hideout and take down all three of them at once, if were very very lucky.

Were not being stupid about this... We are actually about to head out to do the deed now... if any of us survives.. we should report back in a couple days... if this is our last post... then well... you know the rest of the story...

Best of luck to all of you... in case we don't see you again.

Botched Ambush

As a team, we work well together, if we could stay as a team all the time we should be okay..

I don't think that asshole with the sickles realized we were all in the hotel tonight, at least when he, shadow-teleported out of the closet, as best as we can tell, cold clocked Antonio and went for the kill on me, he didn't see Paul dash out of the bathroom, grab him with one hand, and slam him head first into the wall.

This happened about 30 minutes ago, so I think they thought they would catch us sleeping... They were wrong...

Then Paul demonstrated some of the strength of his, by lifting him up by his *face* with one arm and shoved him out the third story window... the only problem was, Paul went out the window with him... Antonio was quick to leap out after the pair... I.. well I personally opted for the elevator, I'm still not at 100 percent.

Paul and Antonio describe it best from here, Paul slammed the bastard into the roof of a car, and was honestly, well, Antonio seems to think Paul was trying to tear his face off or something before getting kicked off, Antonio jumped in and kicked the car in a way to roll it over with telekinesis, the proxy melted into the shadow formed by the car and barely avoided being crushed by it (Paul described that as being pretty badass)

The guy then tried to take out Antonio by leaping out of his shadow and stab him in the back with both Sickles.. he didn't mange to do so, Paul was on him fast.. like blink and you miss it fast, he started by punching him out of his swing, then reached into the guys outfit, and brought out that horrid Bokken... that evil thing Paul wields... He tried to bring it down in the Proxy's face  (Again with the face!) and only struck floor, so help me god it looked like the asphalt cracked a bit.

Then the guy steps out of the hotel Lobby, and bull-rush's Paul, Paul charges back and swings at the Proxy, who parries Paul's strike, with great effort, then ducks low swinging for Paul's legs, Paul leaps up over the swing, and uses the downward momentum to bring the Bokken down on the Proxy, who at this point, was, you guessed it in a shadow... he dropped out of sight, and didn't reemerge...

Meanwhile, I found out that spYder seems to have a second Henchmen, some little girl about my sized in go-go girl clothes swinging a sledge hammer at me the second I come out of the elevator, I barely got down below the attack, I sweep her legs out of her, and try to kick her in her the head, she rolls away from me avoiding my attack, I'm slower than normal, because of my wound.. and she tries to capitalize on it, thrusting the head of the Sledge at me, which I side step and counter with a kick to her ribs, which she just *tanks* her way through (I swear I felt something come loose) rather than defend, she swings the sledge hammer at me catching me, not with the head but the handle in the left shoulder, it was still enough to cause me to go down.

So I'm on the ground, and she tries to overhead smash me with that sledge, rather than roll out of the way, I give her with both feet in the stomach, ruining her momentum and causing her to tumble... her Shadowy cohort then runs in and grabs her, before making a hasty retreat just as the boys are coming in...

In the end, none of us are really hurt, just tired... it was a hard 15 minutes of fighting... and now to make things worse, Paul says he has to make a short trip... to god damn Stonehenge... how the fuck is that supposed to be short? Well he says he plans on going there via the Sanctuary, and he'll be back in a day or two...

He doesn't explain why either.. he just up's and leaves Antonio and myself hanging, I mean at this point I think we drove them off, but it makes no god damn sense... what the hell could possibly be there?

Antonio says that he also has to talk to me about something, but he won't say what that is... Ugh.. were great as a team, but we need to work on our teamwork I say.

Back in the real world

So it's been a while since I've posted, sorry to keep everyone worried about me.

It's Maya by the way, I'm back from my temporary stop in the worlds worst out-patient center.

Nothing against Paul, my stomach feels like he actually made my wound worse somehow... even if it's fully stitched up like a professional did it... That raises questions really. I guess I can't stay mad at him for what happened.. I mean I kinda get it now, why he's doing what he's doing.

I've seen what the Sanctuary is, and I'm being told it's okay to spill the beans on what I know about it.

I woke up about a day or two ago, I was out for... shit days now.. Paul was sitting in his reading chair thumbing through some E-book on his tablet, when he noticed I was up he set the tablet down and just looked at me through his one good eye, he wasn't wearing the bandages at the time, I could see the scar where his eye was, his arm was still slinged but he was able to hold the tablet in his arm, which was impressive considering his arm was broken a few days before.

"I'm glad to see you awake hon..." He says, not smiling.

I had a hard time replying, he felt... just so frankly unreal, I know Manic had posted about how... freaky and unreal he seems, but experiencing it was something different.

"Yeah.. I... Ow..." I winced... I guess I was still recovering

"You still need to rest Maya, that weapon almost went clean through you, we barely got you put back together"

"Who's we?"

"Don't worry about it."

I didn't push at that one, Paul must of had access to someone with some medical skills needed to fix me up.

"Paul.... Where are we?" At this point, the layout of the room was the exact same as the layout of his apartment, down to the finest details, but looking out the window I only saw a sort of mist, like a perpetual grey fog that stretched out as far as I could see, no end in sight.

"This is my Sanctuary. My resting place when I'm not out in the real world, where we are at, is basically side-steeped between Planes of existence, in the mist between worlds... I guess a good way of explaining it is the Astral Plane, though I'm not sure that fits. I know here's safe, here my needs are met, I can rest, and rejuvenate, for my trips to the real world, so I can get what I want from there"

"You mean like revenge? I mean that's why you ended up in Pittsburgh right? because of Ryan?"

Paul smiles and sits by me in bed  "Actually, I wanted to go somewhere safe when I left the path, yes I wanted revenge, I wanted it so bad that I actually ached for it in my very soul... but at that point, I wanted to be safe.. and here I am, I'm outside of our own world, I'm beyond even the Slenderman's reach, a tiny world, created by my own will alone"

"That just happens to look like your apartment"

"Well I did feel comfortable there" He half smiles and hands me a bottled water

"Paul this place isn't real, this isn't your real apartment, this is a mock up, a set, like some kind of stage play, you may feel safe here, and I do too, but Antonio's still out there, and he's alone now, we need to go back there and find him, bring him here, regroup and decide how were going to stop Ryan and-" Paul cuts me off sighing

 "Maya, here we don't have to worry about it, not right now, I wish I could bring Antonio here, but he's a proxy, he's far to tied to the Slenderman to live here, hell my weapon can't even be here because, this place is Antithesis to the weapon, and Proxies as well" He stands up and paces back and forth waiving his good arm about. "Besides why the hell should I go back there except to kill Ryan, that world *Killed* me, I *Died* in that world... at this point the whole damn world can go to hell as long as I can keep the two of us safe"

I pulled myself to my feet, and slaped Paul hard "Fuck you Paul!, Fuck you! Antonio is our friend, and what of Lucia, and Manic, I will *Not* Abandon the two of them, or anyone we know, to stay in this... Dollhouse you made for yourself."

I give him the sternest look I can muster grabbing my guts in extreme pain "Send me back... you can have your so called 'Sanctuary', I'll take the real world any fucking day of the week"

Paul guides me back to bed, and gets me comfortable, I can tell he's deeply hurt... he just says one more thing that day, before he steps out... I later find out this was to talk to Manic... I guess now that I'm caught up that Manic explained how tired and worn out he was, I guess I know why, I mean he must not have slept at all while watching over me.

He got back a few hours later, he sat back down in the chair, I pretended to be sleeping at this point, I just didn't want to deal with his selfish ass, I felt like a prisoner at this point... I was wrong of course...

All he did was sit back down in the chair and started reading that book again... A while later I fell back to asleep

***************************************

I woke up the "Next" day, to a scream, Paul had fallen asleep at some point, and he apparently didn't have a great dream... I woke up, looking around Paul was no longer in the room... I got up. much easier this time, my wound healed a shocking amount over night, and found splashing water on his face in the bathroom... his arm was out of the sling, he noticed me in the mirror... with his one eye and he just said one thing...

"Bad dreams...."

I just nodded and went to the kitchen to get something to eat.. I was pretty damn hungry by that point...

Paul joined me later and sat down... he had severe bags under his eyes and I could tell he only went to sleep, not because he wanted too, but probably because his body forced the issue...

"I thought about what you said last night Maya" He looked at my sternly "Maybe I do need to spend more time out there, Ryan won't kill himself while I hide in here... I need you to rest one more day, then I'll send you back,  and this time.... I'll be there as well..."

I smile at him, even if he still creeps me the fuck out with that "I'm real but not real" shit about him.

"Okay Paul, we'll do this together... the three of us, we'll beat Ryan.... together"

***************************************

Paul is behind me, his arm heals unnaturally fast, though his eye is not healing at all, he told me it was the price he paid for being able to do what he can now do, I'm just about to call Antonio... were getting the team back together... and maybe.... Just maybe, we'll win this fight. I know Lucia sent me the invite to crash over at Antithesis, although Paul seems inclined to pass on it, something about how he has no place there.... I'm tempted to take her up on it, even if I'm not a proxy....

Body of Evidence.

Antonio here, now that I'm set up in Antithesis I went ahead and investigated the hospital that Paul has visited the night before looking for supplies, it was not particularly easy to get past police and security, I managed to do it without violence. I guess I was inspired by Manic's talk with Paul earlier today, I do believe Paul didn't tell the whole story to Manic, I believe he knows more than he's telling anyone.

One does not walk the path uninvited, one must feel the touch of Slenderman to even withstand it.

The area was still cordoned off and no cleaning had been done, someone people murmured about it being arson... of course it was because a medical storage closet just spontaneously catches fire like that...

Some people are stupid is all I'm saying,, I searched for some clues... the most important thing I found was more of the residue that I mentioned previously... the greyish slick residue that seems to be left after paul goes to the place we now know as the Sanctuary... It was a start... if only that's all that happened... it happened suddenly..

"Hoody, what the hell are you doing here?" said a voice from behind me...


I knew the voice, one of the proxies I had been working with this time last year, Vergil

"Vergil, it's been a while, how's the leg?" I smile

The proxy smiles back, we were always so polite to each other even after Paul and Maya liberated me from the Slenderman's service.I did some questionable things to Runners, and on my way out of HIS service, I did more questionable things to Proxies...

"Well the leg is fine now that you mention it, you almost couldn't tell that someone took a wood splitter to it 7 months ago." He says still smiling, still polite

"Well next time I'll just have to swing harder, I don't suppose your going to let me walk out of here are you?"

"I wasn't planing on it....."

"Well then, catch me if you can" With that I went out the nearest window, dropped about 15 feet and landed on the roof of an adjacent building, I heard the soft thud of him landing behind me, he got a bit faster, but not fast enough

He chased me on for about 4 or 5 blocks till I ducked into a parking garage, the idea was to give him the slip, that didn't pan out, he was still tailing me, but at least we wouldn't be interrupted, I turned and swing high, throwing my Kinetic power behind it, he ducked under it and tried to sweep my legs out from under me, I hoped back, and the real fight began.

We would both throw our best martial art maneuvers at each other, roundhouse kicks, joint-locks, attack each others pressure points, neither of us could land a hit on the other, I even cheated and collapsed part of the floor under him intentionally, to bad there was a nice car underneath it.

He lost balance from it, or at least I thought he did, I went ahead and tried to exploit it, but he caught my punch and slugged me hard in the chest, I flew back, and stopped, he still had hold of me, he tossed me into a pillar and started working my kidneys and lower abdomen, but, he got careless.

I had my back to the wall, getting hammered mostly in my arms, I then let out a shout of Telekinetic force that made him lean back, see video games do teach you something.

Then I ripped a part of the wall off and broke it over his face, and he went down... hard.

While he laid there, I could have finished it, I had a rebar spike in my hand still, I could of drove it into his skull and killed him. I settled for driving it into his shoulder pinning him to the ground, it was a quick fix at best, he could get himself out of it, but he was stunned and howling in pain... I made good my escape...

Now I have enough of a sample to get a proper examination done on it, I won't turn to Manic, his motivation for wanting to get close to us is at question, So I'm keeping the sample refrigerated for now, hopefully someone will get the hint from the skull I drew on the Jar I'm keeping it in and not try to eat it... we'll see.

Because If I can learn what it is, I can use it to find this so called sanctuary...

Oh and Vergil? Do me a favor, read that note I left next to you, and tell your bosses Hoody is dead... My name, is Antonio, and I will not return to the Organization.

Sanctuary

So I guess Antonio is taking care of himself for now, that's good...

Okay you get two guesses who this is, the first two don't count, and for the record, I don't like surfacing like this to post, where I'm staying is a hell of a lot safer than this, not to mention I don't like leaving my mortally wounded girlfriend laying in a bed back there on what I hope to hell is enough painkillers to keep her sedated for now.

I surfaced because the dumb-asses went and made them targets, and I was hoping to draw them out, take the three of them, and yes there are three of them. Ryan, and two others, I would of done this a few nights ago if some fucking dipshit Runner got the idea that I was the enemy and attacked me in the ally way I was baiting them in to.

I guess I have that effect on people now, funny what a few nights in a place two steps from hell will do to you metaphysically..

But no, she had to go and get her self semi gutted, and now I'm breaking into a hospital to steal as much medical supplies as I can fit in my rather large backpack, painkillers, bandages, sutures, antibiotics.

Because she's not dying for me... No one is....

And before you get pissy at me about the runner, he was collateral damage, he struck first, I struck last, it could have gone so very differently if the Kid wasn't pissing himself that I had just pulled my new Bokken out a trash dumpster. Fear made him charge when he should have ran and not looked back. He was my first kill... I thought it would be harder than it was.

He was in my way, a step between me and my enemies, my soon to be victims.... But you know, by the time I post this, I'll be halfway back to my sanctuary, safe and sound and treating Maya, and since she's not bleeding at the moment, let me tell you all a story. I guess it's been a few weeks now since I died, so let me tell you how it went down, Maya already told her side of this, but she missed the chat I had with Ryan..

So there I am, battered, having just beaten several Proxies into submission, I'm on the roof of my Apartment building, standing off with Ryan, and he did the usual "Join me, kill the girl, and we can walk away from here" Speech...

I tell him of course to go fuck himself, because I love the girl, even if she's a bloody idiot sometimes, then he lays it on me, I have this part of the conversation seared into my head, I see his face from my blind eye when he says this, and the only way to get his smug face out of my vision is to kill him.

Ryan: "Come on Paul, we already know how this is going to end, your tired from beating my men up, you can't beat me in a fight right now, at least if you kill her you'll know it'll be as painless... or painful as you want it to be"

Me: "Go to hell Ryan, I trusted you, and you were planting memories in my head? FUCK YOU, I'LL KILL YOU BEFORE I JOIN YOU"

Ryan: "Is that anyway to talk to your brother?... Get that look off your face, of course you didn't know, I mean how the fuck would you, our father doesn't even remember me anymore thanks to the boss"

Me: "Wha... W.. No.. fuck that, that's not possible, Thats not fucking possible!"

Ryan: "Did you really think I invented the idea of missing family members being erased from memory? No.. I just took inspiration, I mean I remember the day I walked into your work, and with my words, convinced everyone I worked there on your team, sat down next to you, and over the course of a few minutes, had talked your entire memory into your head, I wanted you to be part of my life brother, and I wanted you to be on my team as well"

The rage was boiling, if this was true, then he had tried to brainwash me into killing my lover and my friend, so I would join up with him... he would do this to his own brother? Then he says four fucking words, and my whole world came undone in front of me

"Remember the truth now"

Then in one screaming moment, all the false memories were torn from my head, only the echo's remain, only the fleeting images of the family I had so deeply held to my chest, were gone... the only thing was left was clarity... and rage.... the rage that would carry me on up till this point.

So we fight, at one point he jam's his thumb into my eye socket, and I feel every moment of it, I scream in pain as he crushes my eye with his finger.. I remember blacking out for a second, then I snap back to reality, and my pocket knife is covered in blood and Ryan is holding his side.

Maya is still blacking in and out at this point, Ryan kicks me in the side, and I feel allot of something give, and he tells me "Our reunion is going to be cut short, I called the boss in to deal with you, he has plans for you... Brother"

The rest is history... I lied to Manic, I lied to Maya, I sacrificed myself to the slender-man so they could escape, and I had hoped, been free from this fucking mess....

I'd tell you what happened on the path... but you know what.. I deserve to keep my secrets as mine, none of you would understand what happened, and why I made the choice I did... I'll say this

The secret is in the blood... My blood... and Ryan's blood....

So it's time I got back, I got my work cut out for me, I don't know if my Sanctuary alone will be strong enough to help Maya recover, and I'm not exactly a doctor... so wish her luck...

Just gotta light a match... and boom... no more evidence that I was here... I'm sure the sprinklers here will contain it.